Jeff Karstens, with a pitch face that looks like it may be an ill-fitting rubber mask, has already gifted the world with plenty of amusing looks. Like this one, for example. But last night, en route to another heart breaking loss, Jeff Karstens gave up the only run of the game on a broken bat fly ball from Justin Upton.
It’s the kind of face that one makes when, in the midst of pondering all the heartbreak and disease in the world, they receive a parking ticket:
Being the Pirates, this setback demoralized the club, as Ian Kennedy struck out the next six batters he faced, exiting the game with a total of twelve. The win put the Diamondbacks one game behind the Brewers for the second seed in the NL, a role any team will want to be in as they try to avoid playing the Phillies.
The Pirates have, remarkably, taken the first two games in their series against the Red Sox and stand only 3 games out of first place, so far be it from me to question their infinite wisdom when making and promoting their giveaways.
But a floppy hat, which hasn’t been in fashion since the halcyon days of Mike Williams, featuring the extremely tacky American Flag logo and a patch for Chuck Tanner? I’m sorry, guys, but this is an absolute mess.
Add in a clearly humiliated Jose Tabata modeling this thing and you have the Manos: The Hands of Fate of ballpark giveaways.
Games like this, especially on getaway days, are not supposed to happen. Players are supposed to be excited about getting to the airport and drinking a few day beers, not making seven run comebacks.
And when I check to see how the Pirates are doing on a Thursday afternoon and see they’re up 7-0, I’m supposed to be able to return to doing actual things, secure in the knowledge that a victory will soon be had. What I’m not supposed to expect is 7 RBIs from the RBI whore tandem of Carlos Beltran and Ruben Tejada.
It was the Mets biggest comeback since June 30, 2000, a time when we were all still reeling from Y2K not actually happening, so it was a completely different world. Just look at the movies we watched back then—A Perfect Storm, The Patriot and a variety of IMAX documentaries? Who were we?