Ozzie Guillen’s Fan Club of 1
Having grown up in South Florida, & counting a handful of Cuban-Americans as some of my best friends dating back to high school, I think it’s safe to say that this controversy will forever haunt Guillen in the Miami market. Ozzie can stand in front of as many microphones as he wants, but I assure you that it will mean very little to that segment of the South Florida community. It is a very proud & passionate people, so while the retired hedge fund manager in Boca will forgive & forget Ozzie’s sentiment, the Cuban-Americans down there will always think of the Marlins manager as an untrustworthy buffoon, to put it mildly. There will be a presser at 10:30, held by Miami’s front office, to announce what action the club will take. My best guess? Maybe a 10-15 game suspension. Guillen will also have to commit to meet with leaders in the community, so that he has a better grasp as to why saying anything positive about Castro in Miami fuels so much disdain. Even then, I doubt Cuban-Americans will ever say the name of the manager of the Marlins, without the tone being one of complete disgust.
Among the gems:
“You have success, you can talk all the shit you want.
My mother is a high school principal. My brother is an engineer. One of my little sisters is a doctor. Another is a teacher. When you come from that kind of family and only get to eighth grade, it’s kind of weird and awkward. But I make more money.
We had this media guy, Padilla. He was eating a cheeseburger during the game. I saw him while I was managing. I grabbed the phone, called the PR department, and said, “Doug, you’re gonna choke on that fucking cheeseburger.” Then I hung up. People wonder, How the fuck did you see him? But I see everything.
What attracted me to my wife is she’s hot. She’s also nice, she’s a great mom — but that comes after she’s hot.
I tell my kids to be careful who they have sex with. Pick the right woman, because that kid is going to be a Guillen for the rest of his life.
A lot of people think I dye my hair. No, I don’t give a fuck. I just worry that my kids live as long as they can. I hope I die before they do. I want to show my friends that they are my friends. I want my wife to know I think she’s hot. I want my team to win games. That’s all.”
Ozzie Sheen / Travolta
“I’m the Charlie Sheen of baseball, minus the drugs and the prostitutes.”
— Ozzie Guillen, who has also previously proclaimed himself as “the John Travolta of Venezuela”
Frank Thomas was honored today by the Chicago White Sox with a bronze statue.
“Frank has been the best hitter this organization has ever seen” - Paul Konerko
“When are they going to give our players the credit to be where we are right now?” [White Sox manager Ozzie] Guillen asked. “When we beat the National League, we were a horse(bleep) team. When we beat Anaheim, they were going down. Now, Baltimore beat the (bleep) out of us, and nobody says anything.
Guillen sarcastically waved his hands over a headline hyping the arrival of the Twins. “Who gives a (bleep) who’s in town?” Guillen said. “How about, ‘the White Sox are back in Chicago after a long trip.’
“Even my wife told me Minnesota is coming to town,” Guillen said. “I said, ‘Good, you dating somebody from there? Who cares.”